


Blowjobs and Self-esteem

by GotTooManyFeels



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Derek and Stiles are the Same Age, Internal Conflict, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 14:32:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4482968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GotTooManyFeels/pseuds/GotTooManyFeels
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a new werewolf guy student to Beacon Hills high school, and he has a class with Stiles Stilinski. How could it go wrong?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blowjobs and Self-esteem

**Author's Note:**

> A prompt from a tumblr post ( http://cuentosallaround.tumblr.com/post/125416305419/hoechlined-au-theres-a-new-werewolf-guy-in ) - This was going to have multiple chapters but I left it for quite a while (sorry if you were waiting! <3) but I've re-read it and I felt content with the end, and felt if I added to the story I may ruin it - So i'm leaving it as a short fic which I hope you all still enjoy, thanks for the read! :)
> 
> *edit 7/5/18* If I find the time I will be writing a bit more for this fic, but I do have a lot going on at the moment so it's 50/50

He fell completely and irrevocably in love with him.

His heart skipped a beat, at just a glance. His eyes would wonder in hopes of finding him. And he knew he’d dedicate his life to his.

*

“Class we have a new student. His name is Derek Hale and he just moved here.” Mr. Harris spoke with that usual twinge in his voice.

Derek’s eyes scrolled across the class room, with a smile that could contest the stars. “Uhhh, hi everyone, I’m Derek.”

Stiles picked up his head catching sight of the new student, jaw dropping. “Oh my god. Scott. Scotty. Who is that?”

Scott with the usual lack of enthusiasm in his voice while in school turned to Stiles. “I guess his name is Derek Hale.”

“Oh god, I want to give him things. Like blowjobs and self-esteem.”

Derek’s eyes flicked towards the gawky looking boy catching every word with his werewolf hearing which he’d still been getting used to. Surprise across his face, then shut his mouth realising the boy was still looking.

Pointing at Stiles, Mr. Harris spoke up. “Derek why don’t you sit by Stiles, you might be able to keep him quiet this lesson.”

“You know Mr. Harris, if you’d actually teach us something useful, I might not need to talk to Scott.”

“Stiles!” 

“Okay, got it, shutting up.”

Mr. Harris turning back to Derek, now with an even darker look on his face than when Derek had first walked in. “Derek.. try and keep him on-top of things, I’ve seen you’re report, quite the student.”

“Oh he can keep me on-top.” Stiles muttered under his breath, still unaware to Derek’s werewolf hearing.

“Uhh, okay I guess.” And with that Derek took his seat next to Stiles.

Stiles extended his hand. “Hey I’m Stiles, this is Scott.”

Scott just nodded and turned back to his work.

“Hey.” He began to flush with slight embarrassment, knowing exactly what Stiles was thinking about him, and now he had to spend the rest of the year as his partner.

*

Class had finally finished and Derek was already half way down the corridor heading for the canteen, when Stiles raced up behind him.

“Hey! Derek wait up!”

“Oh.. hey Stiles.”

“Where you off?”

“Canteen.”

“Oh cool, Scotts gone off to meet Allison, so you don’t mind me coming with you right?”

“No it’s cool.” It’s not like Derek could avoid Stiles, now he sat by him in class, and Derek was new and needed a friend or someone to at least help him settle in until he found ‘his crowed’, which he wasn’t sure if that was even possible.

The rest of the walk to the canteen fell silent and a bit awkward, but Stiles didn’t mind, and Derek had no idea what to say to fill it.  
They got their food and Stiles lead Derek to the table with the rest of his friends were sitting.

“Hey guys this is Derek.”

Everyone just stared at Derek for what seemed a bit too long when Lydia finally said something.

“Wow cutie, where’d you find him Stiles?”

“Chemistry with Mr. Harris. He’s basically my new lab partner.”

Jackson glared at Derek, sliding an arm around Lydia letting him know she was out of bounds.

“I’m Jackson. Lydia’s boyfriend.”

Stiles could see the tension building between the two testosterone fuelled boys so decided to finish everyones introductions.

“This is Erica, Boyd, and Isaac.”

“Hey.” they all said homophonically. 

Derek’s eye’s kept meeting Erica’s and she kept smirking and playing with her hair, twirling it between her fingers.

Stiles couldn’t bare the tension, and well sexual tension. He’d seen Derek first, and this was a great excuse to invite him out tonight. “Soo… Everyone still up for tonight?”

“Definitely.” Replied Lydia. “My Mum said her and Dad have decided to book a hotel room too, so we’ve got the place for the whole night.” Lydia looked at Derek who was staring down at his food, trying no to intrude on the friendship group he’d been brought into. “Hey Derek you should come tonight.”

“I.. uhh.. tonight? What’s tonight?”

Lydia was about to speak again but Stiles interrupted her. “Yeah you should come, Lydia throws the best parties.”

“Yeah it’s true, I do.” She said smiling with self-satisfaction.

“See you should come, get to know everyone better.”

“I guess I could. I’d have to ask my uncle first.”

“Oh, you live with your uncle.” Pipped up Erica.

“Uhh yeah it’s kinda a long story.”

The tone in Derek’s voice told them they shouldn’t ask anything more on the matter. One of those he’ll tell us when he’s ready situations. 

“Okay great, well ask him and here’s my number if you get lost or anything.”

Derek exchanged numbers with Lydia and the bell rang for the end of lunch. Everyone said goodbye and headed for their next lessons.

*

It was the end of the day and Derek was glad to finally be going home. His uncle picked him up in the Black Camaro, which he’d promised to give Derek one day.

Derek didn’t have the conventional relationship with his uncle. For starts, he lived with him, and they were each others only surviving relatives. It was eight years ago when his family died in the fire. His uncle pulled him out, but there was no time to save anyone else. There were so many times when Derek wished any other of his family were saved, but it was him. It was him his uncle grabbed, and him that lived. He wondered why it was him and not anyone else, as he certainly wasn’t the closest with his uncle, Peter never showed that much interest in Derek. Then nearly seven years later he understood. On the night of his sixteenth birthday which also happened to be a full moon, Peter sat Derek down, and told him what was about to happen. The changes he would go through. The nights he could wake up in another place than where he fell asleep. And that was why he was the one saved from the fire. He was a werewolf, like his uncle. But it didn’t happen, and he didn’t change. Not on his birthday at least.  
After the fire Peter became Derek’s legal guardian and moved them out of Beacon Hills. Derek and his family were homeschooled when he lived with his parents, but Peter had him in private education until his sixteenth, when he thought he’d change.  
Peter had their old house renovated and ‘renewed’. They moved back in after Derek’s birthday, and Derek was kept from school completely until he went through the change and had learned to control himself just the slightest bit.  
It wasn't until half way through the year when Derek finally changed. One full moon, he woke up howling, and shook the very foundation he was on. Peter stormed into his room and held him, controlling the new emerging wolf.  
Derek had spent his summer and the last part of his sixteenth year learning to control himself and how to utilise everything he was becoming. After that Derek was allowed back into school, and was only a few days past the new term.

“Hi, how was your first day?”

“It was okay.” Derek spoke bluntly towards his uncle, which wasn't anything unusual.

“Derek.”

“What.” Derek didn’t like to speak to his uncle, he still partly blamed him for not saving anyone else from the fire. Deep down he knew his uncle did his best, but needed something, someone to blame for what happened.

“How was your day?” Peter’s tone changed, telling Derek he wasn't in the mood for his attitude, and although Derek didn’t like talking to his uncle, he still listened to him.

“I think I made new friends.”

“Oh really? What they like?”

“They seem alright.”

Peter spoke about his day the rest of the journey home, and the radio was the only thing making it bearable for Derek.

*

When they were home, Derek went straight to his room, which is where he spent most of his time. It was the only place he felt was his, and was still apart of the home he once knew. It was the least damaged room by the fire, so it didn’t need as much renovating. It also didn’t have the lingering smell of soot and crisp, which Derek felt each time he walked into any other room of the house.

*

Peter called Derek for dinner and this was one of the only times Derek would come out of his room.  
At the table the conversation was flat, but Derek remembered about Lydia’s party.

“Can I go out tonight?”

“Where you planning on going, with who?”

“Lydia’s having a party and invited me.”

“Oh, a girl, is she cute?”

“She has a boyfriend.” 

“Never stopped a Hale before.” His uncle spoke with confidence and conviction, like he’d put his words into practice. “Will you be staying there?”

“I think so.”

“Okay well call me if you need picking up, or you know, anything happens.”

“I’m better at controlling it now. It was one time.”

“Yes but we all slip up sometimes Derek.” Peters eyes wondered slowly around the new, still sparkling kitchen, then into himself. “Even the best of us do.”

Derek knew what Peter was referring to and it shot though him, like a wolfsbane bullet weakening him and piercing this shield he’s created. Unlike his body it didn’t heal as easily, and Derek didn’t know if he ever would. He knew Peter blamed himself for not being able to save everyone from the fire, and he was struggling just as much as Derek, but didn’t like to show it.

“I promise.” Derek voice was coarse, and full of emotion.

Nothing more was said. Derek finished dinner and got ready for the party. He texted Lydia asking the time he should arrive and for her address. She replied saying everyone would be there around 7:30 to 8:00, and with directions. Then followed up with ‘Glad you can come :)’. Derek just replied with ‘Sure thing.’ He wasn’t really one for emoticons.

*

“It’s 8:03, he definitely said he was coming right?”

“Stiles.. He’s coming stop worrying.”

“Okay yeah you’re right, probably just got held up somewhere.”

Stiles was still staring out the window when Lydia moved closer to him.

“Stiles.. Do you really think you have a chance though?”

“Wow thanks.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I meant.. he just.. doesn’t seem the type, and I know you saw the looks between him and Erica.”

Stiles let the curtain fall back in place, covering the window and turned to Lydia. “It’s just.. he’s the first hot guy since Danny.” Stiles’ eyes left Lydia’s and looked down.

“You know what happened with Danny wasn’t your fault. You couldn’t have done anything.”

“I know and I’ve been told a hundred times. But I wasn’t enough to make him stay. I need this.. I’m finally over it and I’m ready to start over.”

“I just don’t want you to get hurt again.”

“I wont, I promise.”

Lydia embraced Stiles and he calmed down.  
Everyone knew Stiles used to be ‘in love’ with Lydia, and he’ll never not be. But now it’s more of a sister, brother relationship. He can tell her anything and she the same. He even came out to Lydia as bisexual because he didn’t know how Scott would react, but she helped him through it, and it made him love her all the more.

*

It was 8:13 when the door knocked and Stiles’ face lit up. Lydia answered the door, and there he was. Derek Hale, Stiles’ greek adonis. Stiles realised he might be pushing it with Derek, but he always underestimated himself.

“Sorry I’m late.”

“It’s fine don’t worry, everyone’s here in the lounge.”

Derek walked into the lounge and Lydia was right, everyone was there. Scott, Allison, Jackson, Boyd, Isaac, Erica and Stiles. Lydia’s ‘party’ turned out to be more of a ‘gathering’ but Derek didn’t mind, and it actually made him feel more comfortable being around less people.

“Hey Derek! What you got?” Stiles shouted across the living room, glancing down at the bottle in Derek’s hand.

“My uncle gave me Vodka.”

“Really?”

“Uh.. well.. I’m borrowing it.”

Everyone laughed and it made Derek smile. He was already starting to fit in.

*

Derek had been at the party for almost two hours, and by this point everyone was either drunk or very drunk. Derek knows werewolves can’t get drunk, but that didn’t stop him drinking a quarter of the litre bottle he took from his uncle, and everyone kept offering him drinks. If he didn’t at least act drunk people might notice, and he was wary. He couldn’t allow himself to slip up.

Lydia had disappeared with Jackson, and Scott with Allison. Which left Isaac, who had already passed out, arms locked around the toilet. Boyd, Erica, Stiles and Derek. They were ‘all’ quite drunk, and Erica thought it would be a good time to play a game.

“Lets play spin the bottle.”

Boyd was the first to interject. “What with three guys and one girl..”

Stiles smiled at Boyd. “I’m a good kisser Boyd don't worry.”

Erica chuckled and Derek couldn’t help but smirk. 

“Nah I think i’ll go check on Isaac, thanks.”

Boyd walked out leaving Erica, Stiles and Derek the last ones standing.

“The three musketeers.” Erica exclaimed. “Derek you don’t mind kissing a guy do you? You probably wont even remember tomorrow with the amount you’ve drank.” She laughed to herself.

Derek was stuck for how to reply. “I.. uhm.. I guess.” 

Stiles noticed the stagger in Derek’s response. “It’s alright we don’t have to play.”

“No it’s fine, honestly, gotta try everyone once right?” Derek knew Stiles wanted this, and it was just a kiss?

Stiles smiled and grabbed the nearest empty beer bottle. They sat in a triangle on the floor of Lydia’s lounge.

“I’ll go first.” Stiles span the bottle and it landed on Erica.

“Looks like I'm the lucky one tonight.” She leaned in and so did Stiles. their faces met right in-front of Derek’s, and they didn’t hold back. The kiss was long, and intense. 

“You weren’t lying Stiles, Boyd missed out.”

Stiles laughed, and Erica grinned. “My turn.” Erica span the bottle and it landed on Derek. Their eyes locked and they slowly leaned it. Derek moved back a piece of fallen hair from Erica’s face and placed it behind her ear. Their lips touched and it was slow. Derek pulled back slightly and swallowed hard, placing his hand along her jaw. He leaned into the kiss again, this time it was strong and passionate. At the end they were breathless. 

“Wow.. Stiles you’ve got some competition.”

“Yeah yeah..” Stiles joked but he felt slightly deflated, seeing them kiss in-front of him like that. It made him almost sure Derek was above him in so many ways.

“It’s your turn Derek.”

Derek spun the bottle, and it landed in-between Erica and Stiles, only slightly more towards Stiles. Derek looked up at the both of them still looking down at the bottle. 

Erica spoke first. “It’s definitely more on your side Stiles.”

Stiles looked back at Derek. “You sure you’re alright with this, you don’t have to..-“

“-Stiles, I don’t mind.” Derek could tell how much Stiles wanted to kiss him, and it almost felt cruel to take that away. And if he thought about he genuinely didn’t mind, if there was another girl and Erica was made to kiss her, there wouldn’t be a fuss, it was just a kiss.

Derek could hear Stiles’ heart pounding, ready to jump out of his chest. They both leaned in and stopped just before their lips touched, eyes closed and soft breaths against each others skin. Derek leaned in the rest of the way, locking his lips with Stiles’. It was slow, and intense, more intense than with Erica. Their lips touching was one rhythmic motion, Derek pushing into Stiles more, and Stiles pushing back. Stiles brushed his tongue lightly along Derek’s bottom lip, as if to ask if more was okay. Derek open his mouth and let Stiles in. Stiles lifted his hand but started to lower it again. Derek stopped him and placed it in his hair. Stiles lightly pulled, and ran his finger’s through; Derek’s hand still atop of his own. 

“Mmm-humph.” Erica huffed after a minute of just watching the boys.

They pulled away instantly, realising they'd been kiss for a while and that Erica was still in the room with them.

“Well, that looked.. intense?” Erica’s eye’s flicked between Stiles and Derek who were still looking at each other. Derek kept looking down to Stiles lips and back to his eyes, like he couldn’t understand what just happened.

Stiles broke their stare and turned to Erica. “You’re right he’s not bad. Still no competition for this Stilinski though.” Stiles smirked, but he knew that kiss wasn’t just a kiss. He’s never felt like that before kissing someone, not even with Danny.

*

Derek felt the butterflies in his stomach, which was weird and strange and he didn’t like the feeling. He stared at Stiles for a while, too long. And it began to hurt. The butterflies turned into a twisting ache, and his breaths became heavier. His eyes started to wonder, and he felt the urge to get up and go. He needed out of the situation, and he couldn’t understand much of anything at that moment. Derek stood up and went to the kitchen, leaving Stiles and Erica in the living room, taking the bottle of vodka with him. He stayed in the kitchen.

*

“You think he’s alright?”

“Stiles he’s fine, just drunk that’s all.”

“You don’t think I weirded him out or anything?”

“Stiles, he said it was okay and it looked like he enjoyed it.” 

“Yeah you’re right, he’s just drunk.”

“I’ll go check on him, I’m sure he’s fine though.”

“Okay.” Stiles voice was understanding, yet full of dejection.

Erica left Stiles and headed for the kitchen. 

“Hey, you alright? You’ve been in here a while.”

Derek turned around to face Erica, the bottle of vodka in his hand, empty. Still no effect. He looked her up and down, his breathing heavy. He closed the gap between them, pushing her against the fridge. Grabbing her arms raising them above her head, tracing kisses along her neck, biting along her neck.

“Derek-“

He pulled back slightly, faces inches apart. Licking his lips and looking at hers, he went in for the kiss. Erica lacked resistance, her arms falling around his neck, his hands ravaging her body. She bit his lip, and his body jolted, thrusting her against the fridge hard. She groaned, then he stopped.  
They both knew what was about to happen, no words needed to be said.  
Walking back through the living room, as it lead to the bedrooms. Derek following Erica. Stiles was still sat on the floor but Derek didn’t look. He didn’t see the guilt and disgust in Stiles face, he felt like he’d pushed Derek into this with Erica. Derek stopped in the doorway, and looked down into himself.

“Derek I-“

Derek took a deep breath and bit his lip. His eyes flicked to the side; he didn’t have to do this.  
His body still for a moment, then carried on through to the bedroom where Erica was waiting.

*

Derek was woken by Isaac jumping on the bed.

“Wake up, sleepy head! Everyone having breakfast.”

Derek slowly rose rubbing his eyes, still adjusting to the light which burned, it was just lucky he wasn’t a vampire. “What time is it?” He said through a yawn.

“Nine, Lydia’s parents should be home at eleven, so she wanted time to clear up. Do you remember anything from last night?”

“Do you? I remember seeing you hugging the toilet.”

“Ah-yeah haha, always get myself into a state.” Isaac’s eyes wondered for a split second, as if revealing there was a reason for it. Derek didn’t question him though.

“Well come on, get up.” Isaac was about to leave the room when Derek stopped him.

“Hey.. is Stiles up?”

“Uh-haven’t seen him, think he went home or something.” Isaac carried on through to the kitchen, leaving Derek in the spare bedroom.

Derek rubbed his hand over his face, and got up and left the room.

*

Walking into the kitchen, everyone was their, including Stiles. Derek ruffled his hair hoping he was slightly presentable, not knowing why that was his instant reaction.  
The only free seat at the table was between Boyd and Stiles. Lydia had laid the table with juice, cereal and toast for whoever wanted it. Derek took his seat and was hungry so went straight for the cereal, also pouring himself a glass of orange juice. Stiles didn’t look at him.

Everyone was laughing and joking about last night and comparing them to others, but Derek stayed quite. Not only Derek but so did Stiles. Lydia noticed.

“You two seem quite, especially for you Stiles.” 

Derek stayed silent and hoped Stiles would be the one to speak. 

“Drank waay too much, not feeling it today.” Derek just went along with Stiles. 

“Yeah, I didn’t realise how much I’d drank till well, I was drunk.” Derek kept up the lie.

Then Stiles kept talking, he hadn’t finished. “Yup, don’t remember anything really.” He took a bite out of his toast, like his words were nothing.

Derek turned to Stiles, but it wasn’t acknowledged. He knew Stiles was lying, and it still hurt Derek, which was stupid because Derek knew what he did last night would have hurt Stiles a lot more. But why? It wasn’t like they were in a relationship or anything, hell he’d just met the kid. So why did it hurt so much?

“So was that your first time?” Boyd directed the question in Derek’s direction, his tone deadpan.

“What?” Derek was now facing Boyd, who’s face was expressionless.

Boyd then smirked, and huffed through his nose. “Don’t play stupid we all know what you and Erica got up to last night.”

“Boyd leave him alone, just because you’re not getting it anymore.” Erica proclaimed like she had something to prove. There were little sniggers across the table, Jackson the loudest.

“Jackson let’s just hope he was longer than two minutes his first time yeah?” The sniggers grew louder.

Jackson didn’t justify Boyd with a response, instead turning back to his cereal. 

Derek wasn’t sure if he was still supposed to answer the question, but he did. “Yeah it was.”

“What longer than two minutes?” Boyd joked.

Derek just laughed glancing in Jackson's direction.

Stiles looked surprised. Derek hadn’t really done anything before. He’d always been sheltered by his uncle and when the fire happened he was too young to be thinking of things like that. He always heard your first kiss was supposed to be special, and your first time you always remember. But all he could think about was his second kiss, it overshadowed everything. It was more than just a kiss and they both knew it.

*

Everyone had left Lydia’s and Stiles was about to get in his jeep, when Derek stopped him at the jeep door. 

“Stiles-“

“What Derek..” Stiles was still facing his jeep, back to Derek.

“I’m sorry.” Derek moved closer to Stiles and his voice sounded sympathetic.

Stiles faced Derek, eyes slightly red. “What for? Sleeping with Erica? I’m not twelve year’s old Derek, and I knew I was stretching it with you. You’re straight I get it, that kiss obviously just felt like it was more to me than it did to you.”

“I thought you didn’t remember anything?”

“I don’t need this Derek.”

Stiles turning back to his jeep and about to open his door, Derek laying a hand on his shoulder trying to get him to face him again. Stiles pushed off Derek’s hand and faced him, now with anger in his eyes.

“What do you want Derek!”

Over a second Derek’s eyes scrolled across Stiles’ face picking up the constellation of moles and his amber eyes, yearning Derek forward.  
He stole a kiss. A soft press of his lips against Stiles’, and hands on his hips slowly pushing Stiles against his jeep. Stiles shoved Derek off.

“What is your problem!”

“I don’t know Stiles - I don’t know why I feel the way I do when I kiss you.”

Stiles voice changed to a more understanding tone, “Have you wanted a guy before?”

“No, I’m not gay. I don’t like guys, but I knew I was hurting you when I went off with Erica and it made me feel like shit.”

“You don’t have to be gay to want to kiss me Derek, you don’t have to label it at all.”

“But it is though isn’t it.. it’s gay to kiss you.” Stiles recognised the internal struggle Derek was having. He’d been there, and he knew how it felt to be told by everyone ‘boys like girls and girls like boys,’ and feeling more confused because he did like girls, but he also liked boys.

“Derek..” Stiles took Derek’s hand, holding it between them, twining their fingers together. “Just be you.”

Derek laughed and smiled at Stiles. “That was so cheesy.”

“Hey I'm trying to help you on this enlightening path.”

Derek looked down at their hands together, smile growing wider, then to Stiles again. His eyes warm and welcoming. “Okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> I realise that it might have felt a bit fast (the sleeping together) bit - but if you read into the text you can figure out why Erica did it and why Derek did [*edit (7/5/18)* I've changed some of the sentencing towards the end of the fic, it completely changes the tone and may not be as straight forward as once thought - re-reading this and changing it slightly has made me consider carrying it on so if I find the time it may be continued]. I wanted this fic to reflect the internal struggle someone may be feeling when going through that time of realising who they are and who they like. Everyone will have a different experience and journey, but this is the way I saw the two boys. I hoped you enjoyed it, thanks for the read! :)


End file.
